Dating Tip: Dinner with Her Mom, Her Dad !

Today is the day. You are all set and spiffy to go over her parent's house for dinner. This is a major occasion for her and you want to do everything within your power to make sure all goes well. Even though this is not your first time meeting them, you are still kind of nervous about the whole affair.

No you are not nervous about your emotions toward her. You like her a lot and think that maybe you two have a future together. She definitely feels the same way which is why you are being asked to her parent's house again (the last couple of guys she dated never made it this far).but you are still uneasy. Why? Because you don't want to go thru what you went thru last time; particularly with her father.

"Can you believe they give the Nobel Prize to a bum like Al Gore?" That's how her father started his first conversation with you. Truthfully you never gave it much thought. Politics and politicians have always bored the daylights out of you. Gore winning or losing doesn't put any more money in your pocket. But the old man kept going anyway.

"That's a subversive organization. Always has been." You ask what organization and quickly regret it.

"The Nobel Prize Committee." Mother and daughter gently chide him to give it a rest but he is just getting warmed up. Before, during and after dinner he proceeds to tell you why he dislikes Al Gore, Hillary and Bill, Western Europe and anything else politically that crosses his radar screen. After the date you don't like Al Gore much either. Not due to politics but because he and Tipper were not here to run interference for you.

Politics has always been a touchy subject but it seems like in this day and age it has reached a fever pitch. While the best strategy is to avoid any discussion, especially on a date, sometimes circumstances will not allow it. So what do you do?

1. Grin and Bear It

Since politics doesn't mean anything to you and her dad is passionate about it, you can always just let it pass. Your date is on the same wavelength as you when it comes to politics; she could not care less. But she loves her father and understands it is in his nature to get wound up about this stuff. Remember also that you are not moving in with them. You will only see her parents occasionally so if possible don't sweat it

2. Steering

There is an art to moving from one conversation to another without being too abrupt or blatantly obvious. This requires listening (I know but do it anyway) and timing. For instance if he uses a certain word or phrase, that maybe the perfect segue to change the subject and start talking about sports, movies the weather or anything else besides politics. Hopefully your date will pick up on what you are trying to do and lend her support.

Understand, it is their house and he is going to have his say but moving the discussion smoothly in another direction may get him to lighten up a bit.

3. Gore! Gore! Rah! Rah! Rah!

Okay this one comes under the heading of the nuclear option. You learn everything you can politically and you charge into a head on confrontation. Now as you have probably guessed this has a lot of downside to it including angry words, hurt feelings and possibly the end of your relationship with her.

However sometimes fighting the good fight is what the other person wanted all along. Her father likes a spirited debate and after it's over he may disagree with you on every issue but he respects the fact that you stood your ground. This elevates you in his eyes. The key to all of this is to get feedback from your date. If she says its okay then you may want to go for it but even then gauge the situation carefully and go slow. Her father might like a good argument but nobody wants to be disrespected in their own house.

If you can avoid hot button issues like politics all together than do so. You like the woman you are dating and you want to like her parents too. However if push comes to shove then consider the three options mentioned above and be particularly cautious regarding the last one. Showing that you can keep things under control cannot help but impress your date, her parents and Al Gore.